Author: Dr. Steroids

Research scientists at The Institute for Hockey Affairs are studying the apparent inverse relationship between any given NHL team’s chances of playoff success and the number of Russians, Swedes, Finns, Latvians, Czechs, Danes, Germans, Morrocans, and Belgians on its roster. “There is a belief that Euros, most of whom never heard of the Stanley Cup until they got off the boat, just do not want to win it as much as the Canadians and Americans do,” said Dr. Freddy Shero IV, director of the Institute. “Sure, Euros skate pretty. They pass like laser beams, they prance around, run nifty weaves…

BackLash held many surprises for WWF fans. The return of Debra McMichael started out the evening as she was the special guest ring announcer for Edge and Christian versus Road Dogg and XPac. That could not compare to what happened later that evening. The announcement of Vince McMahon before the main event that Stone Cold Steve Austin would not be in attendance was another crowd shocker. Linda McMahon stunned her husband when she had reinstated Earl Hebner, not to mention the sudden and unexpected return of Stone Cold, despite Vince’s previous announcement. This all led to one conclusion, The Rock…

Maybe he was trying to stay in character. Maybe he was having a bad day. Or maybe he just didn’t like me. Who knows, but it took some serious arm-twisting to get some answers out of ECW world television champion Rhino. Then again, when you’re 6’3,” 285 lbs. and you win one of the most prestigious titles in the U.S. while essentially a rookie, your actions tend to speak louder than words. Rhino is a dominating force in ECW. He is backed by Steve Corino, Jack Victory and Cyrus (collectively known as The Network), but most people agree he’d be…

The Pittsburgh Penguins avoided being swept from the playoffs by winning the first two games of their second-round series against the Flyers in Philadelphia, and only one man stands between the Black and Orange and their date with destiny. Jaromir Jagr? Nah. Martin Straka? Nope. If you said Herb Brooks because he already has one hockey miracle to his credit, you’d be incorrect again. How about that Ron Tugnutt? That’s right. Ron Tugnutt. After beating Buffalo and Dominik “The Diver” Hasek like a drum in Round One, the Flyers stumbled in the second-round, getting shut-out in Game One and losing…

Remember that big guy with white braided hair and a white suit who ran in on The Godfather last summer on WWF TV? That was Vic Grimes. Remember that big Baldie who fell with New Jack from a scaffold at this year’s ECW Living Dangerously PPV, in one of the sicker bumps in recent memory? Once again, that was Vic Grimes. More and more fans are becoming familiar with Grimes since he started with ECW. He’s been turning heads in a company where heads aren’t always easy to turn. While he is still under a WWF developmental contract, Grimes has…

Jerry Lynn is just returning from an injury that has kept him on the shelf since this winter. Known to ECW fans as “The New F’n Show” since his fantastic 1999 series against Rob Van Dam, Lynn has just rekindled his rivalry with “Mr. PPV.” Jerry worked for a time in WCW under a mask as “Mr. JL,” an ill-fated gimmick that found him struggling to keep attention amongst a number of luchadores during that company’s rise to success. After leaving WCW in 1997, he joined ECW. Toward the end of that year, his name appeared in the brackets for…

My playoff beard is a week old and coming in nicely — not like those scraggly Scandinavians — my ex-wife’s attorney has been suspended from practicing law, and the Philadelphia Flyers rubbed out the Buffalo Sabres in five games. All things considered, This Hockey Fan had a pretty good April. The Flyers had sweep on their mind, but stumbled when they should have snarled in Game 4 and let Buffalo off the hook in overtime. Still and all, THF still believes this is a Team of Destiny. Figure it this way: They’ll get Pittsburgh in the second round. They own…

As WCW’s fortunes declined, did you feel like “I told you so” or was it more heartbreaking since you had done so much to make WCW popular? Eric Bischoff: I described it best to a friend of mine who asked me the same question around the middle of January. And I said, It’s very similar, if you can imagine, to jokingly say to your children, “Oh, why don’t you go out and play traffic.” And then the kids actually went out and played in traffic. But all you can do is stand at an overpass and watch them dodge cars.…

This month boasts the greatest sports extravaganza of all time, Wrestlemania. Careers are made and finished at this event. The venue is never the same two years in a row, and even the faces change. One thing is for certain about Wrestlemania, it will be talked about by wrestling afficianados for years to come. I just thought that in honor of this great tradition that I would recap some great Wrestlemania moments. When Wrestlemania III is mentioned one picture comes straight to my mind. Hulk Hogan and Andre the Giant battling for the World Title. Andre the Champ and Hogan…

Western Conference The Top 4 in the Western Conference are putting together play-off runs that would make the Eastern Conference leaders drool. The Blues continue to ride the league’s hottest goalie to stay atop the division. The Red Wings face an uphill battle to catch the Blues, while the Bourque acquisition is looking better and better for Colorado. Who are we forgetting, oh, yes, the defending Stanley Cup Champs. Turek’s Syndrome St. Louis Blues 78GP, 49W, 18L, 0OTL, 11T, 109 PTS If a hot goalie is the key to happiness in the playoffs, then color the Blues tickled pink. Roman…